to burn.

i can't recall the last time i
caught fire.
i can see the flames
licking at my skin,
consuming me,
but i can't put a date
on it.
as vivid a color i can see,
i don't know how to
just be free.
hopelessly,
here i stand.
without a cause,
here i am.
i woke up yesterday
standing in the pouring
rain.
i can't remember the last time i
caught fire.

i don't need you
to force me to smile.
i don't need you
to share your
halo.
wait and wait,
single file.
i don't need you
to ever know.
i can't remember the last time i
caught fire.



and even if it's just
tonight,
i want to remember
that time.
my spine dancing
with the stake,
the pyre acting
as my throne.
that tiny spark
that brought me home.
i didn't scream, hell,
i didn't move.
i watched you watch me,
and i didn't move.
i can't bring back the last time i
caught fire.



take a step.
one hour, one year.
here's the jump.
one coward, one fear.

i can't remember the last time i
caught fire,
but i know i caught fire
sometime
before.

so let the flames begin.
we are not the same.