the character.

i've noticed
this little quirk
in my head.
i'm counting steps,
but not my own.
what have i done to
wonder about the steps
of another?


don't you love how
at the beginning of a
story,
on the first page,
things are so... happy?
like the world is spinning
at a constant,
and the people are smiling,
and the clouds drift
around without a care.
this beautiful globe
is created,
so perfect,
and i'm counting steps.


but then you turn the page,
and you're falling
deep into this perfect
globe,
only to realize the
immense amount
of scar tissue.
the earth is tilted too far,
those smiles were winces from fear,
and the clouds loom
just a little too long
for comfort.
the clouds are staying,
and i'm counting steps.


you finally reach that
cute little turning point,
and you can see this
happy ending unfolding.
what a relief, eh?
this poor whoever
seems like he'll make it out,
make it out okay.
he's going to be alright,
and i'm counting steps.




[dear reader,
i would suggest now
that you learn to love
the twisted sense of humor
that dwells within the author.
a lion, he is.
as fake and heartless as
the character in a story.]


you finally reach the ending,
only to find that the
poor whoever
isn't here anymore.
you hope that the angels
welcomed him home,
but is there any way to know?
the story fell south
just as easily as you
fell in.
you fell south,
and i fell south,
and we managed
to take a few names
down with us.


the new reality is,
and this is the author
being real,
it's done.
over.
as dead as the
sweet character
from the story,
the one we all had
so much hope for
and yet we did nothing
while he drew his last breath.
remember this,
and sleep well tonight,
there was nothing we could
do,
because he was just
a character
in a
story.


i'm still counting steps.
we are not the same.

pollution.

the sun came up

this morning.

i can't remember

the words,

but if an ocean

was between us

i'm sure

they would come

running.

the best lines

are the ones

i see in the

back of your head

or in the cracks

in the sidewalk

on the way home.

you know i've burnt

so many bridges

with just one flame.

i'm never sure

what you think the

world owes you,

but my plan

is to coax the lion

from his den.

this life is anything

but certain,

but you hold

something i can't hold.

words that i can't speak.

worlds that i can't see.

worth without measure.

i've stepped out and down

from that tiny bird cage,

so call me a free bird.

a new world, don't look down,

back on that day,

call me the liar word.

let's be frank, dear.

i said the words,

and i said your name.

you said the words,

and you opened that door.

like a thief in the night,

wave goodbye to the

crown jewels.

to the towers,

and to the servants.

so i might slip again,

fall fast and hit hard.

maybe i'm already there,

and i can't shake it.

the shock is moving,

and i can't fake it.

she looked at me once more

and she whispered,

"i said the end,

but this looks to be

the beginning."

i'm done.

we are not the same.

the white fence.

for one to fall and

rise in just

one moment,

one breath.

breathe easy.

108.

speak softly

to the

concrete and clay.

malleable or not,

because it's always

the prettiest people

that make the ugliest

faces,

and i can't be held

responsible all

the time.

1[zero]8.

welcome, new world.

tick. tick. tick.

this is nothing more

than the actual

over the theoretical,

and we're left

with what's left,

and i'm okay with

that.

if you're a killer bee,

as i've assumed you are,

then i want to be a 

killer bee,

too.

won.oh.ate.

i've seen your eyes,

know your plans,

bring me your rules

and your horizon.

no silence,

if silence is gone,

call me 'your highness'

when all is wrong.

perceive the world,

a stage.

"your name,"

they scream.

take it and lose it,

as i am lost too.

so run, run fast.

onehundredandeight.

run, run fast.

we are not the same.

the 'd' word.

you can paint the sky
day after day,
but each night it'll
all fade back
to black.


there's a time in
our lives,
where we begin
to write our
story again.
where my pen
met the page,
and you smiled
at me.
you smiled,
and it was over.
i didn't even
notice the ink
bleeding
into the
edges.


rules are for
sea creatures,
correct?
i knew the game
we were playing,
but i didn't know
the "next day"
clause.




it was dark that night,
you remember?
i couldn't see the
look in your eyes,
so i assumed
the best.
"it's not like that,"
you said.
so adamant.




in the event of a disaster,
keep calm and carry on.






i've seen things i can't believe.
all those little wonders
were fun while they
lasted.


i'm going to live, i'm alright.
i'm going to die, i'm alright.
that's some dream.


we are not the same.

bailar conmigo.

can someone explain
to me, what is
this game?
why has the moon
become such a silly
shade of white?


i've lost my power,
and drank of ignorance.
i need propulsion;
a rocket.
and while we circle
the earth,
can someone explain
this conspiracy?


tell me your theory.


when i pass myself,
mirror mirror,
i see the king without a


crown.


i've claimed the moon,
and i'll be damned
if i'm ever to come down.


i hate this part,
i really do,
but i must dig
for something new.






because i needed to know
that it was something you'd keep,
and you set fire to it the moment
i turned my back.
i'm not coming back.


long nights and first bites.
we are not the same.

tsomla.

clear.

clear and concise.

your fingers

paint pictures

of palm trees

in the wind.

and i can still

see that sparkle

in your eye.

i can feel your

excitement when

you handed me

some forgetmenot

you'd been holding

for god knows how long.

how you jumped at

opportunity

to finally give

it over.

goodbye to all

i thought i knew,

and to all you

thought you had.

goodbye to trials.

goodbye to streetlamps.

that lullaby you sang

in some language

i wish i could

fully comprehend.

that time it was

time to step up

for once in my life.

goodbye to staying

up all night with you,

and goodbye to

floating in your dreams.

you found me in the ocean

when my ship had

lost its sail.

from the deep, you came,

and in blue you shall remain.

key after key.

slowly tapped.

resources i never

knew i had;

instincts, untapped.

i thought you were

playing the song for me.

i struggle with the thought

that it was about me

for the future.

you took my hand

and said to me,

"this could be the end."

your face was stern,

and my heart continued to beat.

what i never saw coming,

but i always knew.

now you're a ghost,

and i will make a bet

that any passerby

can walk right through

you.

goodbye to all the

great romances

of the 21st century.

goodbye to the lion's

roar, but not the honey

in his head.

goodbye to shops of gold,

but never what you said.

goodbye to the dead flowers

you left me with,

and you walked away.

[you never did,

but you always do.

i'm just a kid,

you never knew.

you gave me wings

and i never flew.

we counted kings,

something grew.

and now i'm through,

these drops of rain.

falling fast,

it's just a game.

and now at last,

i'm chasing fame.

chasing something,

not the same.

check the books,

i called your name.

hear the hooks.

it's such a shame.]

author's rebuttal,

you've called me down.

i'm here to plead my case.

i'll make it back to

that broken sail,

in the middle of the ocean.

or at least to the palms

you painted me.

to the lullaby you sang.

your silly little games.

goodbye to speaking,

whispering,

breathing.

you're dead now.

this is your funeral.

you're dead and gone.

and just before they

box you in,

i see life in your eyes.

goodbye.

we are not the same.

city meet sky.

i'm moving forward,

but where is forward

from here?

i've found this trail,

but i can't shake the fear.

i'm done.

let's go.

i've got this list

i like to keep.

most see it as

a dirty little joke,

but i've got this

list and i keep it

steady.

write them down,

scratch them off.

death and life.

life and hate.

i like to take them

deep, where

i know they

can't swim.

around the other side

of the sun,

where i know they

can't swim.

it's sad that i

know my place,

where i belong,

and where my

belongings are home,

and you are lost.

apparently lost,

as you can't seem

to keep your mouth

from losing things

that it should have

in a vault somewhere.

a vault of ice,

because the warmth is gone.

here's your confirmation.

because i don't mind

what you think about me

when i'm walking away.

if you can see the drops

of aether dripping

from my hair,

well at least

somebody knows

they're there.

and if i lose your

name like ray singh's letter,

as it flies in the wind

and i fall to my death,

then there your name

will go.

goodbye and good day,

just tell me your name

again in the

morning.

dreams are drifting,

misunderstood,

but the side of me

you should see

just isn't as good.

this list keeps changing

like the list of fate,

name after name,

one for the other.

death's deal,

and you took it.

you took it.

so here i have this trail,

and this trail is all i have.

a new life, with new faces,

and a new life for you.

i lost quite a bit of respect

for you just tonight.

just tonight.

so here i have this trail,

and i'm going to make

something of it.

something, indeed.

i've never been one

to walk alone,

but it's time to take

the lead.

sometimes what you

want shadows

what you need.

i never let myself

go with the wind,

but past this fear,

i feel so free.

goodnight to you,

i lay you to rest.

close your eyes

and dream your dreams.

it's on to the next.

now is never,

and tomorrow is never-ending.

we are not the same.

to burn.

i can't recall the last time i
caught fire.
i can see the flames
licking at my skin,
consuming me,
but i can't put a date
on it.
as vivid a color i can see,
i don't know how to
just be free.
hopelessly,
here i stand.
without a cause,
here i am.
i woke up yesterday
standing in the pouring
rain.
i can't remember the last time i
caught fire.

i don't need you
to force me to smile.
i don't need you
to share your
halo.
wait and wait,
single file.
i don't need you
to ever know.
i can't remember the last time i
caught fire.



and even if it's just
tonight,
i want to remember
that time.
my spine dancing
with the stake,
the pyre acting
as my throne.
that tiny spark
that brought me home.
i didn't scream, hell,
i didn't move.
i watched you watch me,
and i didn't move.
i can't bring back the last time i
caught fire.



take a step.
one hour, one year.
here's the jump.
one coward, one fear.

i can't remember the last time i
caught fire,
but i know i caught fire
sometime
before.

so let the flames begin.
we are not the same.